Unfortunately, I have appeared to have lost my interest in playing piano and composing music. This is something that I have done since I was 15. I have taken breaks from composing before but it seems like I am just not getting anything done musically.
I used to practice for an hour or two everyday. I was absorbed in my work. I was passionate. It’s not that case anymore…I have to “make myself” play through my compositions every once in a while so I don’t forget them…not that I could forget them since I’ve played them thousands of times.
I really like my most recent composition Luminescence. It was coming along fine for a while but it’s been months since I’ve written a since note. So, I hate to say it but I’m not going to force myself to play…I’m only going to play when I feel like playing.
So, I read a lot of self-help books. I am all about setting goals and having a definite chief aim and all of that but unfortunately I’ve lost of my passionate for my #1 goal which was to be a composer.
Being a composer is actually a very difficult and challenging goal. It’s certainly not something out of my realm of possibility, but it’s just not something I feel driven to do right now. (And I feel terrible about it!)
Eric thinks I need to explore my other interests…which I am trying to do. But I’m not really ready to call it quits on the music. I’m also not willing to put the time into it right now since I don’t enjoy it like I once did. Maybe it’s a phase. Maybe it’s something entirely different.
Either way I did enjoy playing piano for my boss and co-workers for a little fundraiser I put on for Furkids. (Raised $400!) So, my piano is not going entirely unused. Maybe I’m a little too hard on myself but I do feel unmotivated and not as interested in composing right now…but I’m hoping that it will come back to me cause it’s something I really have enjoyed in the past.
Wish me luck!
Well, I decided to finally log back into my old personal blog and do a post. It’s been since 2012 since I’ve written anything! Wow, how time flies!
I have quite an interesting life. I now have lived in Atlanta, GA since 2013. I went a time without working…but now I have a job that I’ve had since October of 2015. I work for Furkids Animal Rescue and Shelters…at the cat shelter. I’m a kennel tech and yes I shovel cat poop with a litter scoop among other things. I actually really enjoy my job! I get a lot of exercise and I stay very busy. I also work with a lot of great people and animals!
What can I say? I’m a cat person.
I hope that as I write this new personal blog that it will inspire me to write more of my articles of Hubpages where I actually make a little money off of the ads and I get scored on my penmanship. But honestly I love writing on my personal blog because there are no rules and I can write about what I like. Not sure if anyone wants to read that but I have to say it doesn’t matter…I’ve been told having a personal blog can be therapeutic.
So, since the last time I blogged I got married! (That’s good! Real good!). My husband Eric is very wonderful. He shows me the world in a different way and treats me pretty darn good. He supports my various projects which is nice…including the fact that I am going back to school this fall! (Yay!). I’ll be attending Georgia State University Perimeter College! (Sweet!). I will only be taking one class so that I can ease my way back into things. I’ve done college before and somehow I seem to overdo it, but hopefully not this time. Also, I’m medicated. (Yay!) …which I was not medicated during some of my previously failed attempts at college. So, I am excited and proud of myself for taking my meds and staying for the most part balanced.
I signed up for school as a music major but I am seriously thinking about changing that. We will see what I do after I talk to an advisor. There are other things I am interested in doing…but all I have ever known is music.
Anyhow, I’m just going to stop there. Thanks for reading!